FRANÇAIS
Il vivait dans l'un de ces quartiers ouvriers sordides et décrépis qui bordent le canal, aux abords d'une boulangerie industrielle. Je serais incapable de retrouver les lieux. Je me souviens de l'énorme cour intérieure où il disait faire du taï-chi très tôt le matin. Dans mon souvenir, elle était moins une cour qu'un terrain vague, offrant depuis l'appartement, dans les étages, une vue imprenable sur le désastre urbanistique, économique et humain qu'était ce quartier, et que j'aimais précisément pour cette raison. Je me souviens avoir exploré l'appartement en-dessous du sien, abandonné depuis l'incarcération de son locataire. Je lui avais volé deux pellicules, que je n'avais finalement jamais fait développer. Il y avait un foyer Sonacotra non loin, dont il m'avait raconté que des pensionnaires en avaient défenestré un autre. Je n'avais pas jugé bon de lui dire qu'une de mes tantes, alcoolique et schizophrène, avait passé une partie de sa vie dans des foyers de ce genre. Pas plus que je n'avais osé lui dire – mais peut-être aussi n'en avais-je pas encore vraiment conscience à l'époque – que ce monde-là m'attirait, que je sentais obscurément qu'un jour je finirais dans une semi-prison, un purgatoire de ce genre, et que c'était une idée effrayante mais attirante aussi, comme l'entrée au monastère ou l'abandon voluptueux à l'irresponsabilité.
ENGLISH
He lived in one of those squalid, decaying working-class neighborhoods lining the canal, near an industrial bakery. I wouldn't be able to find the place again. I remember the enormous inner courtyard where he claimed to practice tai chi very early in the morning. In my memory, it was less a courtyard than a wasteland, offering from the apartment above an unobstructed view of the urban, economic, and human disaster that was this neighborhood – and which I loved precisely for that reason.
I remember exploring the apartment below his, abandoned since its tenant had been incarcerated. I stole two rolls of film from it, which I ultimately never had developed. There was a Sonacotra hostel nearby, and he told me that some of its residents had once thrown another out the window. I didn’t think it necessary to tell him that one of my aunts – an alcoholic and schizophrenic – had spent part of her life in places like that. Nor did I dare tell him – or perhaps I wasn’t even fully aware of it myself at the time – that I was drawn to that world, that I had a vague sense I would one day end up in a semi-prison, some kind of purgatory like that, and that it was a frightening idea, but also an alluring one, like entering a monastery or surrendering completely, voluptuously, to irresponsibility.
He lived in one of those squalid, decaying working-class neighborhoods lining the canal, near an industrial bakery. I wouldn't be able to find the place again. I remember the enormous inner courtyard where he claimed to practice tai chi very early in the morning. In my memory, it was less a courtyard than a wasteland, offering from the apartment above an unobstructed view of the urban, economic, and human disaster that was this neighborhood – and which I loved precisely for that reason.
I remember exploring the apartment below his, abandoned since its tenant had been incarcerated. I stole two rolls of film from it, which I ultimately never had developed. There was a Sonacotra hostel nearby, and he told me that some of its residents had once thrown another out the window. I didn’t think it necessary to tell him that one of my aunts – an alcoholic and schizophrenic – had spent part of her life in places like that. Nor did I dare tell him – or perhaps I wasn’t even fully aware of it myself at the time – that I was drawn to that world, that I had a vague sense I would one day end up in a semi-prison, some kind of purgatory like that, and that it was a frightening idea, but also an alluring one, like entering a monastery or surrendering completely, voluptuously, to irresponsibility.
Note:
"Sonacotra hostels" were residential facilities originally established in France in the 1950s to house immigrant workers, particularly from former French colonies in North and West Africa. Managed by the state-owned company SONACOTRA (Société nationale de construction pour les travailleurs), these hostels were intended as temporary housing but often became long-term residences. Over time, many became associated with overcrowding, social isolation, and marginalization, reflecting broader issues of immigration and urban poverty in postcolonial France.
